Hotel Motel No More!

Thank Baby Jesus! We found a new place! I'm hesitating to call it an apartment, considering it feels like a Condo with it's HUGE living room, 2 bedrooms, 1.5 bathrooms, washer & dryer (in the unit), deck and keyless entry! We met our landlord last night and discussed his philosophy on renting, and within minutes we signed a lease. He was very eager to rent the place and waived the standard fees, and deposits, I was completely amazed. Jen and I are super excited to finally be moving into a place that will feel like a home.

More fun stuff and pictures to come.

TOMORROW: Choosing paint from Home Depot!!

Picture Post

As promised...


Beene and her new toy...


Harper & Beene checking out the goods...


Me and the Mama...


Happy New Year's everybody!

Happy Over Commercialized Holiday

Ya I said it. It came. It went. I'm glad. I'm not by any means a fan of the "holiday" season. Personally, I feel like "Christmas" is just an excuse for children and spoiled adults to demand gifts from their families and friends. My point of view, it's a rip off.

Maybe Christmas would mean more to me if I was uber-religious, even semi-religious. I think people have forgotten the history of Christmas http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Christmas
and have just latched onto this over commercialized version, and are now passing it off as the real deal. Sorry professional Christians, your day of celebrating the birth of baby Jesus is now just another excuse for some spoiled ass rich kid to get that motorized Escalade from Toys R Us. Greed breeds all other nasty attitudes, thus I've chosen to not celebrate Christmas. Plain and simple, I'm boycotting. I refuse to get sucked into the obligation of buying people crap A. They don't NEED and B. I can't afford. So, I've taken the guess work out of it for my people, don't get me anything. Save your money, better yet, surprise me with something later in the year. Why does it take a faux-holiday to get people to do nice things for eachother? Again, its bullshit.

... end rant...

We decided since Christmas Eve is just like any other night to us, we'd go out and get smashed. We walked along 1st Ave looking for open bars, and spent a little time in Del Rey before being served a horrible Redheaded Slut w/ Crown Royal in it, BLAH! I talked Jen into walking to Sonya's for a proper drink, and we proceeded to get all kinds of tispy drinking perfect Cosmos. Yum. After getting good and liquored up, Jen made a necessary pit stop at McDonald's while I passed out in the passenger seat. Nursing a hangover, we gave our pups some new toys to tear apart. (Pictures soon) And went to eat a non-holiday related dinner... in a bar. Haha, we rule.

Mulleady's in Magnolia has got some of the best Stella Artois I've ever had. Try it.

I'm back at work today, a little bored, but spending my time removing decorations from around our office. Getting things cleaned up, and presentable again. I've got 2 more days of work before ANOTHER 4 day weekend. I'm thoroughly looking forward to getting trashed on New Year's Eve.

I do hope everyone was safe, did what they wanted, and got a good buzz on this last weekend. If not for the true meaning of the holiday, I guess for the sheer notoriety of it.

Loosen those belts..

Thanksgiving is rapidly approaching, and I can honestly say the lack of bird this year isnt that big of a deal! We've got a spectacular menu planned, and I'm getting hungry just thinking about it. I'm not much of a cook normally, but when there is a big kitchen available, and a reason, I'll roll up my sleeves and whip something up. Neither Jen or I are very big on Holidays, but I'm really looking forward to spending winters with her. I love this woman more everyday. Laying in our bed, her face illuminated by the soft glow of the blue lights we hung in our bedroom, she is gorgeous. I have a renewed feeling of dedication, and adoration for her, the more things we go through and experience. Relationships aren't easy, it's the hard ones that test you and your love for one another. And I love her enough to work hard at this, and never throw in the towel.

Yesterday, we went shopping in the U Village. We went with the intention of sniffing perfumes and grabbing a few items at QFC. We walked away 2 1/2 hours later with bags from Bartell's, Sephora, Barnes & Noble, QFC and a little tree from Ravenna Gardens we've aptly named Henry. It was an expensive little trip. I walked away with a new Stella Mccartney perfume, makeup bag from Sephora, a scale, birthday cards, a new 2007 planner, and a "George W. Bush Out of Office Countdown" Calendar, by far my best purchase of the day.


My favorite fact on the calendar thus far is: November 2, 2004 Bush is reelected for a second term, He recieves 59,054,087 votes and, as was the case in 2000, a single state determinded the election result. The electoral margin is 286-252. The following day, The Daily Mirror, a British publication, asks on its cover: "How can 59,054,087 American's be so dumb?"

Since the overturning of the House and Senate to Dems in the November elections, Bush seems to be scrambling to save his ass, and the very few approval points he has left. He's been kissing Nancy Pelosi's ass for weeks now, and it sounds like he's bringing his pops around for some needed face-saving PR. It's sad he's come to a point where he has to exploit the efforts of his one- foot- in- the- grave father. Within the last few weeks, he started taking ideas on Iraq, knowing that once the flop happens and Dems take control he's going to want to be in a decent standing with the majority. I said it this morning on the way to work, I think the one positive to have come out of this incapable man's presidency is the fact that political dialogue is now an almost daily occurance in households and work places. It's forcing the American population to recognize the fact we entrusted a complete ass-puppet with our safety, security and MONEY for the last 6+ years. It begs the question to be asked again, How can 59,054,087 American's be so dumb? Hopefully, we'll realize the err of our ways, and pull our collective head out of our ass before the next Presidential Election.

October in Review

October has been a crazy busy month around here. Work is continuing to kick my ass. But I'm slowly turning it around to work in my favor.

DESK JOCKEY QUOTE OF THE DAY:
Shit rolls down hill folks and I'm not at the bottom anymore. Enjoy.

Jen and I headed out to the cabin for my best birthday ever and we spent the weekend tasting wine, and enjoying the final crush festivities. Pictures are included below and there are more to come. It was so fun! We slept in, and ate well. I finally got her to watch the Godfather with me. Ah, I love her for putting up with me. :)

Our Second Home:



Us at Benson Vineyard:

The Vineyard:

YES, that is MY girl holding up the "fruits" of her labor after
participating in a grape stomp!!!


On the way back we made a brief stop in Leavenworth, and ducked into Uncle Uli's tavern for some brautwurst, chili, and football. We were struck by a down pour, and it cut our tourist activities down to a quick run into the local Bavarian Bakery for struddel. YUM!!


Here's a few of the kids for the road.

We call this one "Hotel ScHMarps"

Beenes in her *NEW* bed. Fancy!

Sweet Home Alabama

Mmm, the 5 Spot's "Sweet Home Alabama" themed menu last night was awesome!

Jen and I decided last minute that we deserved a dinner out, and I treated her to some good eats and drinks. The 5 Spot was nice and noisy, just like I like it. Put me in a quiet, snooty restaurant and I'll probably pass out in my salad. I chose a few glasses of a good Viognier to get a buzz going, and had the Cornbread & Cranberry Stuffed Chicken w/ collard greens and baby red potatoes. Jen went with the vegetarian option, and some of the best Cosmo's I've ever tasted! I was really impressed that the 5 Spot has a Juice Press, so the limes were freshly squeeze and it really made a difference in the final taste of the drink. I think it ever bar had one of those I'd turn into more of a lush than I already am.

Jen and I grab dinner out a lot, but going and having a sit down at a restaurant is alot different for us. It gives us a chance to sit, and have a full conversation, really enjoy the food, and enjoy eachother's company. I love sitting across from her, and watching her talk, and laugh. I fall more and more in love with her everyday. She lights up when she has a good meal, and I love that about her. She has a passion and hunger for good food just as much as I do. Luckily for her, it doesnt mean her ass will gain 5lbs just by smelling something, unlike mine.

We've been back at the gym for about 2 1/2 weeks, and I'm sure it will eventually begin to pay off again like it had before. At least it better. Its hard falling off the horse and then trying to get back on again. Especially when the horse kicks you in the back of the head and then laughs when you get back on. Thats about how it feels at this point. We slowed down to the point where we didnt even think about going. I think in a week or so we'll be back up to full speed again, and we'll be feeling good about it. Either that or I'll turn the proverbial horse into glue. Ah the choices!

We have a full couple weeks coming up, but what's new? We're house sitting this weekend, with plans to play some put-put so I can humiliate myself, and our Mariner's game is Sunday!!! I love going to games, a lota beer with a little baseball on the side. Next weekend we are house sitting AGAIN, and I'm (im)patiently waiting for our trip to Chelan for my birthday. The biggest debate for the trip is whether to drink gin and tonic, or screw driver's. I love it. :D


Desk Jockey Gripe of the Day: TURN ON YOUR DAMN CELL PHONE. I dont want to spend the better part of my morning trying to track you down. Either be at your desk, or answer your cell phone. A deadline is a deadline buddy. If you don't pick up, you miss the boat. And it AINT my fault.

Day 1,189

Today, is day 1,189. This day holds absolutely no significance except for the simple fact I actually sat and thought to myself "God, how LONG have I been here?" That's actually a really long time. If I really wanted to get technical, I could break it down farther to the ACTUAL number of days worked (so excluding weekends, and holidays) but you know... I compare this to prison sometimes, and they get to count weekends and holidays, so why can't I?

So, on Day 1,189, I think I did my fair share of work, and have earned my pay check this week, that will sadly all go to bills. Money comes and then it goes to maintain this (not-so) extravagant lifestyle. OH! The 427 sq. ft. apartment is quite glamorous! And OH! Having to choose between either watching channel 5 or 7 is far too exhausting. It's rediculous how I live, basically, day to day to pay the rent. Man, I wish I had no hopes and dreams, and working at a coffee place was a "good job". Ignorance. IS. Bliss. It is. I wish I never knew how much money I could potentially make everyday by doing this job. Now I'm accustomed to it, and I wouldn't consider getting out of bed for anything less. Sad, I'm the equivalent to a snobby overpaid actress...

Sick and Tired

I am so sick and tired of working this local desk. I feel irritated and pissed off all the time. Right now I'm accomplishing the work of 2 people, and the additional crap these customers are expecting me to do is rediculous.

A. Keep track of your own shit: I am not your mommy, your banker, your accountant. Do it your DAMN self. If you aren't prepared for a $3k bill at the end of the month, maybe you should keep that in mind while youre having diareah of the brain all over your ad copy for the weekend. If you dont have the money to spend, don't waste my time. I'm not going to keep track for you all damn month long, making you some pretty spreadsheet so you can present it to your boss as your own. PUH-LEASE. Give me a break. I've got enough asses to wipe around here without adding your's to the bunch.

B. We aren't friends, stop acting like we are: I dont like you. There, I said it. I pretend to like you because that's my job. You calling in asking for "a favor", doesn't make anything happen any quicker than it would if you were a random off the street. Trust me, you are not first on my list for anything. I've about had it with the shmoozing, and the *wink wink* salesman talk. I'm not on your showroom, looking to be financially raped by inflated costs, I'm a business partner, and should be treated as such.

C. You ALL have horrible taste: Honestly, as a consumer, in the untapped age group of spenders, I wouldn't buy something from you if threatened me with a red hot poker in the anus. Wouldn't happen. There are a select few I would consider doing business with out of sheer obligation, but for the most part, your ads make me queezy and they do not make me want to do anything but wipe up my own vomit with the paper. Thanks.

Overall, I think I've hit my cynical breaking point. I want to do MY JOB. Not everyone else's. I've earned the right to do this cake-walk for a while. Instead I've been running a triathalon for months, and damn it, I'm tired. I'm 22, feel like I'm developing an ulser, and I can't afford to keep up with the new grey hair's that seem to have taken over my head. It's like I have a degree in ass-kicking, and instead I'm only doing ass-KISSING.

This is the "I cant think of a title" Blog

I've been a busy girl lately. Last week, I came to the conclusion it was time to trade in the tired old Neon for something more practical and more specifically NEW. The Neon has been running shitty for a little while, sad considering the car only has 85k on it. Well, after figuring how much I would be spending on up coming repairs (brakes, SES light came on…) it was in my best interest to trade in the car, and purchase (or rather let FMCC purchase, and then I pay them) a new truck. After enlisting the help of a co-worker, I was contacted by the General Manager of a prominent local car dealer, and he set up my deal himself. Working within the parameters of what I was looking for/willing to spend. And within an hour he had picked out a truck, told me they could finance me at 0%APR, and told me to come down that night and sign the papers. I was a little leery, I work with these guys every day, I know how slimy some dealers can be. In some aspects they are worse than a drug dealer.
I walked into the dealership at 7pm, found my truck by 8pm, and was approved for my loan w/ 0% APR, my payments were close to $300, AND they were willing to take my crap-ass Neon off my hands, paying off the last of the $2,500 I owed on the loan from BofA. These guys hooked me up. By 11pm, I was in my new truck *sigh*, driving home to snuggle in bed with my wife-to-be. The next day I got a call telling me they had to have my mom sign over the Neon too because she had co-signed on the original loan for that car. Anyone who knows me, knows my family lives 2+ hours away, so me driving over there, last minute with no notice to my work was not an option. After talking with the dealership, they decided to put a sales girl in a car, and have her drive the 4 1/2 hours round trip, just for a signature. Over and beyond, I tell ya. I was blown away. I will be a return customer. I'd love to post a picture, but who knows what psycho stalkers could be reading my blog searching for a way in... so I'll keep the photos to myself for now.

Part II

Sunday, I prepared a "follow the tea light candle" hunt through the house, complete with perfume, 29 flowers (in honor of her 29 years) and a home cooked meal for Jen's birthday. The dinner turned out as I'd hoped, and she loved the perfume. I tried my hardest to show this beautiful woman how much she means to me, and I think she knows ;) I was so nervous setting everything up, I spent 3 hours running around sweating making sure everything was perfect. She is more than I ever could have asked for and she deserves nothing but the best. So I gave it a shot.

It was a great lead in to our Don’t Wear White After Labor Day Party on Monday. The Panty Dropping Party Punch was all we could have wished for, and more. I'm sure some PG pictures will be posted soon of the debauchery that went down last night. I have to say the group of friends we are developing is awesome, we all have such a great time. And it's always good to befriend people who drink just as much, if not more, than you. We polished off 6 bowls of punch ( this consisted of an entire handle of 100% proof Vodka, and a bunch of juice to mask the overwhelming taste of booze), and a bottle of gin. Yes, we are TROUBLE. I managed to get my tipsy self into bed before 1am last night, and I was thanking Goddess I didn't have to be to work until 9am today. My throat is still hoarse from the 2 cigarettes (BAD) I sucked down last night in my buzzed state. And now, a photo montage:

And a blurry picture of me and the wifey for good measure:

Work is totally kicking my my butt today. I took a half hour break to eat, and read the paper and then it was right back to the grind. We are down an associate, and another decided to take today off. Her last day is this Friday. I'm not too sad I wont be here to say good bye. Personally, she's been nothing but a head ache from the beginning. I didn't know whether to be pissed she put in her notice when she knows how badly we need people, or go dance on her desk because I'm happy to be rid of her once and for all. Whatever, we'll get through it. Nothing is surprising me around here anymore. I'm more prepared each day for someone to take off. Leaving me up shit creek over and over again. I'm hoping I can make my way to a more structurally sound "ship" in the near future. Watch your asses kids, Shannon's on the war path for a new boat to command.

The Revolving Door

I had some time to think today, in between meetings and schedules, Sharpie pens and tape... to look back on the last couple months of my life and the friendships that have ended. Fallouts being big or small... I've noticed that quite a few people have enjoyed my company, and then took their leave for reasons either known or unknown.

I think friendships are based on a mutual love, respect, understanding and patience. Those 4 simple principles are essential to making relationships (any relationship) worthwhile and meaningful. I feel like I've been a good friend to those who have come into my life. I've tried my hardest to listen to their problems, give advice when asked, or just shut up and let them rant until they are blue in the face. Only to turn around the next day and beat that same dead horse over again... just one more time for good measure. Communication like that is essential, the way you react to someone spilling their feelings, filled with joy and inevitably sometimes saddness, will ultimately decide the depth of the friendship you will retain with that person.

Bad jobs, family issues, shitty boyfriends or girlfriends... 9 times out of 10 one of these topics is what you're discussing with your friends on a daily or weekly basis. How often have you thought to yourself 'Jesus, I'm sick of hearing about this already!!!', while your girlfriend calls you for the 4th time in 2 days with the same endless rant about her boyfriend. Come on... be honest. Eventually, you listen hoping she will hear her own words, and turn it around, apply it to her situation, and move on. Normally, that doesn't happen. Relationships can take weeks or even months to fizzle out, or explode with a necessary *BANG* in order to knock that friend loose. Fact of the matter is, you could be listening to the same story over and over again, with no end result. At this point you have two options, BAIL or stick it out. Now, I'm a "stick it out" kinda girl... no pun intended... I'd listen to a friend until my ears bleed. Because thats what friends do. I'd sit while she cried, buy her drink after fruity drink until she was drunk as a skunk passed out in a bar bathroom, if it made her feel better. The bailers, well, needless to say I've encountered my fair share. And you know what, friendships are like jobs, you have to work at it. They aren't easy on your stress level or your time. And if someome has a shitty work ethic in the friendship department, I'm better off. Go ahead and bail, if I'm not good enough for you to want to stick around... adios.

I'm in no way bashing anyone person in particular, even I've fallen victim to a case of "I dont want to leave the house or even call friends back syndrom" during points in my life. No stones being thrown here kiddies... I've been a lazy friend too. But that doesn't mean my love and dedication to that person falters. It doesn't mean, in my friend's low point I would say "You know what, I just don't want to deal with this anymore".

I see a revolving door of friendship developing, of life actually, we've become so accustomed to possesions and people being expendable. Replaceable. I wrote a blog a long time ago, and in it I said "I want to be anything but expendable.", and that statement rings truer today sitting here blogging 5 years later. I want friends who understand me, who know I'll listen to them for hours. Who know if they tell me their crampy and PMSing, I'll get in my car and show up with Haagen Daaz and midol. I want friends who know how important my time is, who accept the fact I'm a busy person, and are satisfied with quality time rather than quantity time. Friends who love Sex and the City, but don't live their life like they wish they were on the show. Maybe those friends are out there, maybe they aren't.

I'm thankful for my old friends. Here today, I'm thankful to the ones who have left, making room for people who don't believe in the revolving door. I'm thankful to the new friends who have come into my life. Those who step up, and stick their foot in the path, of that door, and defiantly stand their ground. Their position never faltering, their friendship for you worn on their sleeve.

Friendships arent expendable, conditional or easily defineable. So, step out of the TV kids, come back to reality, not everything can be summed up in a Carrie Bradshaw quote.

ANI or BUST

My weekend was great. J and I packed up, and spent Friday night w/ M & J, and their puppy Aadon (happens to be Beene's brother from another litter; same parents). After eating some grub, we cracked open the Melon Skyy Vodka we brought them, and played the Mexican Train Game. If you've never had a chance to play this, you should get on that. After a few rounds we got bored and switched to a game of truth or dare. Tops were shed, whip cream applied. It couldn't have been funner with any other couple. Those girl crack me up. We got to bed alot later than planned but managed to get up at 5:30am and make it out the door by 6:15ish. After a brief stop at Jack in the Crack for breakfast, and a pit stop to check the tires, we were on our way.

We made it to our camp site after a short detour through farm coutry. The site was practically a resort as far as Im concerned. There were nice showers, and bathrooms cleaned daily by a cleaning service. Our camp site was big, and spacious w/ water, AND electricity plug ins. Its about a 5 minute walk from a HUGE lake/resevoir/marina, so we swam and floated on our blow up mattress a lot. Sunday we toured some wineries, and tried to escape the bees that took a liking to J's sweetness. Monday we got up super early b/c it was so hot, and went down to the lake and layed out in the sun. Having nothing really to do until the show, we went back to our favorite winery and drank more, ate cheese and crackers w/ fruit.

The whole purpose of this trip was to see Ani diFranco at Secret House Winery, and it was AWESOME. We were about 30 yards away from the stage, thats SO close for GA Ani concert apparently. She talked to the crowd a lot (which she doesn’t do normally) specifically about her new pregnancy and it was a really good time. Tuesday we got up early, packed out and made it back into town about 11:30am. Normally its almost a 6 hour drive, but we did it in less than 4 with no traffic.

It was good to come home, and pick up the dogs. I had such a great 4 days away, spending time with my love. It was probably the best vacation I've ever had.

THIS WEEKEND: Ani show at Marymoore!!! Hempfest at the Seattle Center.

The Longest Month

I feel like crying today. Everything I’m doing at work seems to come out wrong. I’m not the strongest when it comes to math – finding the gross, then the net; figuring IN or OUT commission – it’s just never been my forte. I’m trying my hardest, and no matter how hard I try, it seems like things are coming back around, biting me in the ass. On the surface it looks like I’m doing everything correctly, and then the technical Gods work against me, and this God-dammed program just does things “automatic”. Of course, being a novice, I don’t think to go back and check it out. I think “Cool, I did it right, move on to the next order.” But it’s that next order that forces the “automatic” to impose itself on the original order. Not that any of this is going to make sense to anyone but me. And even still… I DON’T GET IT. Maybe I’m hard-headed, I don’t know. But it seems like this whole month has just been trial and error, and the error is making me seem incompetent when I know I’m capable.

This is a sneaky job. To outsiders, or even my co-workers, it may seem laid back, and easy. Like I’ve got a lot of free time, and yes, I do. But the dark, ugly secret is that this position filters lots of money weekly, bigger numbers than they are aware of. And it all rests on my back, and the back of my rep. If one or both of us slip, or miss something, it not only means back tracking the whole process but going back to the client and explaining why we can’t do it right in the first place. I’m aware of “learning curves”, and that some jobs take getting used to but this isn’t one of them. You have to be fully prepared to jump headlong into the responsibilities. Maybe I wasn’t as prepared as I thought. Maybe I’m not cut out for this.

Top that off with running around downtown today on my sorry excuse for a lunch, and I’m a huge ball of fun times today. Standing in line after line, dealing with huffing and puffing irritated sighs from people miserable to be doing what there are paid to do. I feel like the negativity of my surroundings, coupled with the frustration I’m feeling at work is making me a snippy desk-jockey today.

So what do I do? That’s the million dollar question. I tough it out everyday, hoping I didn’t eff something up the day before. A girl can dream.

#*&%@^*! Internet

Ya ok... so I posted a semi-lengthy blog recapping last night, and fore shadowing fun things to come this week, and for the 2nd time since I have begun blogging on blogspot my web browser mysteriously froze then disappeared, only after sucking my intensely thought out blog into the black hole of cyber space. Gone. No prompt. No nothing.

*Poof*

Bastards.

Mafia Monday

A lazy weekend at home seems to be just what the proverbial doctor ordered. J and I spent a lax weekend at home, doing no more than necessary and I actually liked it. We've had some seriously busy weeks, and I felt I needed a break. This is of course in preparation for our camping extravaganza this coming weekend in OR. It feels like YEARS have passed since the words "Ani in August" we're uttered by this lovely female who has inhabited my life. Even though the excitement hasn't struck me completely, I felt the need to go shopping Saturday. Its like I'm a kid the week before school starts. After a disappointing trip to GI Joes (what company doesn't reorder camping gear MID CAMPING SEASON... Ugh), our luck shaped up when we made a trade for a new 4 man tent! Woohoo.

Sunday we slept in and enjoyed the morning, running out the door by 12pm to find decent parking for another uneventful Mariner's game. I think the only reason I go is to drink beer and flirt with J in public. Both good reasons as far as I'm concerned. So, the M's lost, no surprise there... and we managed to depart from said game sober enough to drive, and without having to kick some bitchy woman's ass who decided to start crap with us in a crowd outside the stadium. Good times as usual... just a day in the life of Shannon, I tell ya.

The beer and food left us really sleepy and so we laid down and took a nap... rousing around 8pm, just in time to grab some sushi from Sam's. Which has become our personal chef lately... 4 visits in a week is becoming excessive. Sam waved to us as we left and said " Thank you, have a good night... see you tomorrow!" Sad... we are now the lazy girls who each there nightly. Eh... its damn good sushi. Try the crunchy roll, you'll go back for seconds.
TONIGHT: Yes kids, it's that time again. Mafia Monday is upon us...

Devil Dogs

Don't get me wrong, I love my dogs. Harper and Beene are great pups with super attitudes. But occasionally I forget they are still canines and capable of destruction, without giving a second thought to consequences. The last couple days these two have been nothing short of temperamental little bastards, and I've wanted to break their little puppy legs. (Back off PETA, I'm only kidding.)

Two nights ago, my love and I decided on sushi for dinner. We walked the block up to Sam's and stuffed ourselves full of delectible finger food until we were on the verge of bursting. Of course that didnt stop us from making a pit stop on the way home to KV for dessert. Total... we must have been gone 45 minutes. We both acknowledged that the dogs deserved a trip to the P A R K and planned on taking them when we came back from dinner.

*Key in the lock* Door Opens*....

"What the hell is this...."

To my complete and utter astonishment, we walked into an entire newspaper shredded into hamster bedding, and a couple of sleepy eyed dogs... sleepy from the roll of Ritz crackers they managed to wolf down! We had a good chuckle to ourselves because it was hilarious, and then returned to scolding the demons sitting wide-eyed and stuffed to the gills.

Flash forward to this morning...

Beene thought it'd be a good idea to chew the crotches of our underwear, (2nd day in a row) so she spent the morning in her crate. After eating most of her breakfast, J crawled back into bed for a few minutes of snuggling... when out of no where *smack smack chomp chomp*... Harper helped herself to the remains for J's oatmeal sitting on the coffee table. GREAT.

Thinking the worst of the devilish dog activity was behind me, I left Beene out of her crate while I took a shower, so she could have a few minutes of freedom. Less than 15 minutes later, I walk into the living room, to my little pug... curled up... all soft and cute... next to J's orange rocker... CHEWING ON IT. Jesus... kill me now. I think it's time for an exorcism people. My house is being over run by Satan's little helpers.

2 Blogs in one day

This is now my second blog of the day, a celebration of my return to blogspot. I deviated from blogspot, instead journaling on myspace, thinking more people would enjoy reading my senseless babbling there. Well... myspace sucks lately. Its been completely inundated with hackers, spammers and pedophiles... THAT... and my work has officially banned us from accessing it by blocking the server. Woe is me... no more trolling out of sheer boredom. R.I.P. Myspace, it seems the sun may be setting on the era of your rule. Oh well. Moving along...

Work has been keeping me on my toes lately. I'm still kind of learning as I go. Luckily, I've hit few snags. I do so enjoy getting a paycheck, so I'm trying my damnedest not to eff anything up beyond repair.

Capitol Hill Block Party on Saturday rocked. We managed to position ourselves just outside the side entrance to the main stage so we had a clear view of the VIP area, the stage, and the bands waiting to perform. It was nothing short of awesome to see Silversun Pickups, my new obsession, LIVE. For your viewing pleasure....




These guys are awesome as far as I'm concerned. If you watch the video, you can see how hard the drummer rocks out. And the fact they have a girl playing bass, is just cool beyond words. I can't wait to see them again.

TONIGHT: Unpack the rest of my crap.

You were prepared...

I haven't updated in close to a week! Gosh, what a slacker. Being busy and hopelessly in love really keeps you from blogging... too much sex I think.

So, since my untimely exile from Best Friend Island, I've kept myself quite occupied. Friday, I interviewed for a promotion within my esteemed department, and felt indifferent whether my hard work would be rewarded with a small hike in pay and a HUGE bump up in responsibility. I showed up, letter of interest & resume in hand, wearing my nice slacks and a cute office-girl worthy shirt, and to finish off the ensemble my DKNY black heels. Killer. I managed to talk, be witty and completely pit out my shirt in an hours time. Talk about nerves...

Friday night, I pulled myself together and took my super cool girl out to meet my only other real lesbian couple, J & M, are tons of laid back fun. We shared a bowl of kim-chee (a Sonya's specialty) and super strong gin & tonics (w/ extra lime please...) and managed to get sloshed and slap-happy all before midnight. Go team drunkard! The next morning, hangover clad, J managed to slink off to work, and I stayed home with the pups nursing as much water and IBprofen as my body could handle. Saturday night I was lucky enough of accompany the previously mentioned super cool girl to a Birthday BBQ at her friends' house. 3 beers, a handful of appetizers and 1 Irish Car Bomb later, I was golden and in with the in crowd. After changing clothes, and 1 more beer we met the birthday girl and friends at a Bob Schneider concert at the Crocodile Cafe. Not my favorite venue, but the show was unreal. Bob was a totally rad pot smokin' hippie singin' about God on Cocaine and during one song we had to say "Arrrrrgggghhh", hmmm something about pirates I guess! Good music + Good friends + Too many Stella Artois = A couple of drunks stumbling home, and peeing next to a parked Jeep. (PS. Friends... that was not me you saw peeing on a Jeep's bumper!)

Sunday, my younger sisters came out for a long overdue visit, and I spent the day with them and J shopping, and walking around town. After they left I was treated to a back rub and my hair petted until it was time to adjourn to bed in my little bungalow of a loft. And yes... it was ANOTHER late night. I LOVE my life.

This morning I came into the FAB news that I did, in fact, get the promotion I interviewed for, and will soon be taking on a National desk w/ Lead responsibilities. I couldn't be happier with my life right now...

PS. I'm so happy I can share this all with you.

TONIGHT: NO GYM, long walk with the pups, and a quiet night.

Immaturity Abounds

This will be an effort on my part to relieve the last bit of unwelcome stress that has developed post-fight with my friends of the last 2 years.


My friend who came into town, decided to have her birthday dinner at the most expensive restaurant in Seattle. It is not a little known fact that I don't have hundreds of dollars to be throwing down on a meal that Im going to eventually expel from my body anyways. I had absolutely no idea how incredibly pricey this dinner was going to be until I looked at the menu online. I couldn't even afford to just drink and eat an appetizer. After further investigation of the lunch menu, I noticed said restaurant displayed basically the same meals, at about 65% of what they charge for the dinner! Overall, this was going to shape up to be the most expensive purchase I've made in months (aside from rent...) and I just honestly couldn't afford it. Now, I'm sorry but if a friend can't afford something, I consider it bad form to turn around and give her a guilt trip. Most people would understand, acknowledge the high prices, and be satisfied with my company out at the bar we had all planned to go to for drinks.

I guess it wasn't going to be enough. I woke up the next morning thinking everything was fine, that she understood, and that we would all still have a swell breakfast and proceed together to go look at Bridemaid's dresses. I was completely WRONG. I came home to a message notifying me that they had bumped up their departure time for breakfast by a half an hour. 5 phone calls later my friend finally picked up. Breakfast had been moved to Alki, and it seems the general consensus was it would be a better idea for me to just meet them at the dress shop.

I had been SHUT OUT.

Apparently, my not being able to attend dinner was a HORRID thing, and I was a terrible friend for having an issue with the outrageous prices. (OH and PS. I had just had lunch with her and her fiance not 1 day prior.) All of a sudden, standing in the middle of my living room, I felt as if I had time warped back to high school, and I saw how pathetic it was that I had allowed someone to effect me and my happiness to the point of tears. I had had enough.

I called my friend's phone and low and behold she couldn't even pick it up, she had to give it to someone else. I immediately thought... "how childish is this going to get? You can't even pick up the phone and talk to one of your "best friends"." What kind of friendship is that? It's a friendship based on conditions, and obviously I hadn't met her conditions to be considered worthy enough to even talk to on the phone.

Long story short, I apologized to our mutual friend, and asked she let the birthday girl know I would not be attending the dinner as well as the dress shopping, and I just can't have people in my life who I'm not good enough for. I didn't even have to say anything else, as soon as my message was relayed I'm sure I was black listed and I will inevitably be shunned by this group. As sad as it was to have to end such great friendships, I can't be friends with someone who values the appearance of going to a fancy dinner over my feelings, and sheer ability to afford it.

IN OTHER NEWS:

I spent my weekend with the most amazing woman! Saturday we hung out with her friend Lauren, and made it an early night in preparation for FolkLife the next day. The rain let up just enough for us to stroll up the street from her new parking spot, and enjoy some food and crafts at the festival in Seattle Center. Monday we got up at 6am, and began packing the last of her things, and I spent my day scrubbing floors, vacuuming, mopping, and dusting. When we were done with that place it sparkled! For my efforts I was rewarded with a 314 Burger from Broadway Grill (yum), and Snow Patrol tickets @ the Paramount (yippie!!). Disclaimer: I have the best girlfriend, EVER. Be jealous.

Things are already starting to be homey at the Hotel Motel Holiday Inn, sooner rather than later life will get back to normal. (Even though I didn't mind the craziness.) My life is full, and happy.
My cup runneth over.

The honey IS the money.

I honestly don't think I've had this much fun my entire life, until recently. I'm totally loving being with J, she is so able to go out, meet my friends, and fit in like she's known them for years. And then turn around and just want to stay home and watch a movie.
I LOVE IT.

Last night, Ozzie's was a HUGE hit. We stopped by her new place to pick up the keys and sign the lease (which is about a block away from the bar... DANGEROUS), and once we were finished there we headed over to meet some of my STC buddies for drinks. Mind you, I've only hung out with about 3 people from work in a bar setting... and while it always turned out good before, last night was even better! I got to see some of the coolest people I work with in a casual setting with plenty of libations, and it ROCKED. I'll save all the gory details for my personal file of enjoyable dirt on other people. I'm thinking J living in QA is going to be SUPER fun!

This busy week is almost over, giving way to a very busy weekend. Tonight we're going to spend a quiet night at home with the dogs. Tomorrow I'm meeting the girls for brunch & bride's maid dress browsing, then fancy-schmancy dinner finished off with more drunken debauchery in QA. Hopefully, Sunday we'll be able to make it down to FolkLife to eat some funnel cakes and salmon ceasar salad. YUM.


3 day weekend here I come.

PS. You rock my world like no other...

Plain and simple..

"I'm looking for love...Real love...

Ridiculous, inconvenient, consuming,

can't-live-without-each-other love."

-Carrie Bradshaw

I'm feeling this more every day. And the best part is, it's not freaking me out. Thats a good sign. This week is incredibly busy, and I can feel my attention being pulled in so many directions. But at the end of the day it's the most unbelieveable feeling to lay down next to her, with our bodies touching, and feel completely at ease. That closeness calms my fears and unruffles my feathers, leaving me with a clear head and a pounding heart. My heart swells with happiness when she calls me at work just to talk. Our communication will be what gets us through, and it is the main reason why I feel like this could really be something. People are so closed off, so scared to really say how they feel, no matter the time frame involved. Being around her openness is a breath of fresh air, and knocks me off my feet at times.

So, with all thats going on (J moving, the dogs, Cailin being in town, Volunteer stuff...) my brain is a little fried. Hopefully, J & I can have some alone "couple" time this weekend, and just be able to chill for about 5 seconds!

I think this post is a reflection of my energy level b/c this is where I'm stopping.

TONIGHT: Dinner & Gym

TOMORROW: Lunch w/ Cailin, Clint, Lacey & Sarah.

Ya... I said it...

Yesterday was a super long day, and today I'm just completly wipped out. My meeting at the Center turned out pretty good, no screaming or fighting dykes. I'll give a big thumbs up to that. We accomplished alot in the short 45 minutes we had to discuss where each of our individual efforts were. Below you'll find my two flyers. The first is for the March itsself, the second is JUST for my volunteer recruitment. Fun stuff... I heart Photoshop.

So after the meeting, I met J at her house to get the dogs and head to the gym. Well... 15 minutes turned into a 45 minute wait, and by the time she got home it was close to 8:30. Late nights at the gym aren't for the faint of heart. I was so tired but I knew if we didn't go, it'd just start the lazy ball rolling. After our standard 30 minutes on the bike, and some light weights, we decided to call it a night and go home. I sometimes step outside my euphoric thought process for about 5 seconds and look down on us and wonder how it is we had never met eachother before. I realize that timing is everything, and things happen on their own and the way they are supposed to but this is just too good to have only been going on for a few short weeks. The comfort level is immense and the more time I spend with her, the more I never want her to leave. I have always said I want a partner, someone who will be on my team, and work through everything with me, side by side. And I just may have found that partner. She is so incredibly fucking supportive, she encourages me to take care of myself, and she goes over and beyond to help me. (FYI: She is actually taking MY car in to have it's brakes looked at today.)

Long story short, I've got all these amazing visions in my head, and it may seem a little idealistic but I don't care.

PS. I want to live out every dream to it's fullest with you. I hope you'll have me...

A Girl and Her Dog...

... have strolled into my life, and I love it. Talk about a total package, and me getting lucky.

I'm really lucky this total package I refer to as J, came with an adorable English Cocker, Harper. Beene hasn't been lonely all weekend, even when J and I would take off on our own for a couple hours. Beene is starting to pee outside, and I can see how well behaved she will be with such a good, consistent voice around like J's. I hit the jackpot dating a dog walker!

So, Saturday... I took the dogs on a walk to the P A R K, and when I came back I noticed my car door was unlocked. Odd considering slamming the lock shut is so automatic to me, I never forget to do it. I looked a little closer and noticed my glove box was WIDE open, and my center console had been rifled through. And low and behold... yes, Shannon left her purse in the car. GONE. Luckily, I had my debit card in my pants... but my driver's license was taken, my insurance card, all my phone numbers AND my good clinigue compact & not to mention my $15 philosophy lip gloss from Sephora... SAD!!! So, in honor of the unwelcome invasion to my car, we decided to spend an hour or so cleaning out our respective vehicles. Something mine has needed for weeks!!! During this overhaul (and trust me thats what it was), J checked my oil, as the light had started to flicker within the last couple days. Low and fucking behold, my car was running on NO oil... ha. Story of my life, Murphy's Law " If anything can go wrong, it will." So, further inspection revealed I will most likely be needing some brake work done, and *VOILA* *POOF* Way to break the bank!! So, after giving me a good talking to ;) J, the pups and I went on errand runs. She fixed my tail light, we bought dog food, and went to the bank.

It was an oh-so domestic Saturday afternoon between two people who weren't looking for a relationship, and then this amazing thing happened. Saturday night was awesome, drinking hard cider and chatting, then heading out to my local haunt for a snack and cosmo's. I haven't been that buzzed in a long time, and of course I have this weird streak of luck running into people while Ive been drinking! As we were leaving the bar, I noticed a group of people... who just happened to be work friends standing outside... I had the awesome opportunity to introduce the most amazing fucking woman, to a handful of people who actually matter to me in one way or the other. Great sex lead to a late night, which lead to a rough morning Sunday. Obviously, nothing a little coffee and a good breakfast sandwich can't fix. We spent Sunday downtown, enjoying the city and the stores, walking around doing couple things. It was so unbelievably cozy to do those things with her. Walking through the market with her, the Harps & the Beene I felt like this is the fullest my life has ever been. On an extermely positive note... J found a place. YAY... its small but with the right stuff in it, we can make it work for her. I'm soooo happy she found something she is willing to work with.

We are so enthralled with one another, we managed to leave our left over sushi last night at the restaurant and didnt even notice when the server came after us. This obviously led to a severe laughing fit all the way home... which continued after a needed bowl of good greens, and snacking on a plethora of random food.

The last few minutes of my outstanding weekend were spent laying in bed next to the most beautiful woman, watching her fall asleep until I drifted off myself.

TONIGHT: Meeting @ The Center, gym with SUPER fitness girl

Lazy Days

The introduction of Harp & Beene seems to be going really well. Last night was a little hit and miss, but Beene so desperately wants to play with Harp all the time, it's so cute. She managed to sleep in a crate last night and not be a HUGE baby about it, I was so proud. I think J is taking a liking to her, regardless of all her silly puppy qualities. I'm really going to appreciate some training input from someone with so much experience with dogs. What a treat!!

The gym last night was amazing. I ate a good dinner of halibut, yams & green beans before we went, and by the end of our work out I was hungry again. I feel like my metabolism is finally speeding up and I'm burning off what I eat alot faster. We biked another 10.8 miles last night, I got my heart rate up to 202. Thats nuts!! I was borderline ready to pass out or puke by the end of the work out but my body feels good today.

Today, J had to head off to work, so I'm here on the couch watching movies, and responding to volunteer emails while the pups nap on the couch. Harps is being such a good girl... Beene is within paw distance and they are looking sooo cute together. I love it when they are calm.

TONIGHT: J @ my house w/ the dogs. Tomorrow... peroshky's in the market & possible a long walk with the animals.

PS. I feel at home with you...

It's a Beautiful Day...

Today is a definitely a day for U2. After a night of cleaning my house, (in preparation for J & Harp's sleepover this weekend) I went and spent my 5th night with her. I've never felt so close to someone so fast, I've never felt so ready to be with someone fully, as I do with her. Honestly, I feel safe. I feel safe knowing she is the person she wants to be already... she is no work in progress, no half assed attempts. She seems to live her life to the fullest by doing what makes her the most happy. Cheesey... but its refreshing to have finally met someone like that. Someone who doesn't need fixing... someone I can just be me with. I look at her and I get lost, she turns away. I think the feelings are just intense between us, it's almost like my eyes burn right through her's, and she can feel it. I see the worry she has, the hurt she's felt, and the caution she's still holding onto... all in her eyes. But there is so much more there... I can see the hope, she hasn't lost that.


(Brockley's first day home)
Today is the final day of "shared custody" of the dogs, I'm a little sad knowing this will be the last time I see Brockley for probably quite sometime. But this is the time for me to fully break away from a person who has turned my world upside down more times than I can count... this is LONG overdue. I remember the first time I laid eyes on her I teared up. Sitting on Cathy's hardwood floors watching Brock bumble around, all cute and floppy, still so unsure of how to walk without running into things. I do have to say it hasn't been easy with her. Her behavior and lack of bladder control have been a problem for so long... I only wish she gets into some obedience classes. I know she will be happy staying with my ex, and that does give me some comfort knowing that she loves Brock so much, and would always take very good care of her. It still doesn't take away from the heart wrenching feeling I have writting this.

Current Mood: A little sad, but overall very happy.
TONIGHT: Apt. viewing w/ J & the Harps & the Beene, gym, dinner of halibut, fresh corn on the cob & veggies & going to bed early!!

I will have a fabulous weekend. Again.

PS> This is how life should be...





"Touch me, take me to that other place.
Teach me, I know I’m not a hopeless case..." - "Beautiful Day" U2
I want to know all there is to know about her.

Computers for beginners...

I swear... if any of you reading my blog don't efficiently know how to use a computer, please, by all means speak up. I will be more than happy to come to you and do an in home tutorial. Why am I offering up my services? I've absolutely hit my breaking point with one group in particular I'm being forced to deal with for the Raise Your Voice March. I'm about to raise MY voice... at them!

Even with this small irritation, my day is still amazing. I'm not getting a whole lot of sleep lately but it's for a DAMN good reason. I can't even begin to explain the absolute awe insipring addiction I have for this person. The time we spend together it productive, and worth while, overall this is the most positive about life I've felt in a long time.

I can't wait for the gym results to start paying off. I'm really pushing myself harder than I ever have before. I realize in order for this to work I need to change my activity level as well as the food intake. So at this point, I'm being really aware of what I consume and more importantly, how much.

This is getting cut short... I'm being enticed via yahoo messanger.

Tonight: Cleaning & organizing.
Tomorrow: Plans with J & the dogs.

EDIT: Highlight of my day... leaving her notes. And the reaction when she find them...

Collapse into me, tired with joy...

I am so rocking out this morning. I've just got this incredible burst of energy lately, and it's really keeping me going. I love this feeling of motivation and lightness that's been coursing through me for the last couple days. I feel like the weight of everything serious is being lifted and I'm left with this peaceful but excited feeling of not knowing what may be around the corner for me.

I'm so hungry today... the fruit and granola I ate just wasn't enough. I think I'm craving other things, rather than food. I'm craving attention, and devotion, and activity. I can't wait for the gym tonight. My mind is spinning so fast I can't grab onto one or two statements, it's all a blur of words, and feelings and ideas.

-----------------------------------------

ANTM with the ladies is going to be phenomenal. What more could you ask for... Appetizer, wine & good friends! I'm really not all that enthused about the final 3. Jade is irritating with her Drag Queen qualities, Joanie is just too easy a choice, and Danielle is just a little too Southern Ghetto. I don't know, its like the Devil, the Favorite, and the Underdog. It really could go either way!




Currently Listening to: Snow Patrol "Hands Open"
Tonight: Gym, ANTM, and the good company of "A girl and her Dog"

Dykes on Bikes

Trips to the gym just got a little funner. I've managed to snag myself a SUPER Fitness Girl to partake in some much needed workouts. We stationary biked for 30 minutes (10.8 miles), then we did about 30-45 minutes of weights. I felt and feel amazing today. It's like my body really needed this. All the stress I've had built up over work, and volunteering... it all just came pouring out last night. It was the best... ok maybe something else is a little better.

I stayed up until 2:30am last night... god I haven't done that in so long. I've never had so much to say in my entire life. I'm going on 4 1/2 hours of sleep right now, and I woke up to a breakfast of eggs w/ mushrooms, tomatoes & onions w/ really good organic toast. YUM. I woke up, threw on my capris and I just felt ready for the day. I'm pounding the water right now, and anticipating my next trip to the gym with my Super Fitness Girl.

Verse 63:
Act without striving.
Work without interfering.
Find the flavour in what is flavourless.
Enlarge the small, increase the few.
Heal injury with goodness.
Handle the difficult while it is still easy.
Cultivate the great while it is still small.
All difficult things begin as easy things.
All great things begin as small things.
Therefore, the True Person never attempts anything great,and accomplishes great things.
Lightly made promises inspire little faith.
Trying to make things easy results in great difficulties.
Therefore, the True Person regards everything as difficult,and is never overcome by difficulties.

Word of the day : Introspection

Introspection: Contemplation of one's own thoughts, feelings, and sensations; self-examination

After having such a stressful week at work, and in regard to the volunteer work I'm doing on behalf of the Center (for the rally), I really needed to spend some time with myself and have a little fun. The fun was great, SUPER even... but when it came down to it, I believe it's safe to say my weekend was full of introspection. I spent a good portion of my time outside, really enjoying the sun and trees, and things I normally would take for granted.

I feel the need to be more thankful for what I do have in my life. I really feel the need to take better care of myself... mentally and physically.

Verse 3:
Not exalting the talented prevents rivalry.
Not valuing goods that are hard to obtain prevents stealing.
Not displaying desirable things prevents confusion of the heart.
Therefore, the True Person governs by emptying the heart of desire and filling the belly with food, weakening ambitions and strengthening bones.
If the people are simple and free from desire, then the clever ones never dare to interfere.
Practice action without striving and all will be in order.

And PS. You're OH so cool...

VOLUNTEERS WANTED

Volunteers WANTED!!

Alright guys… here it goes. I’m the Head Volunteer Coordinator for The Raise Your Voice March & Rally on Capitol Hill, Saturday Jun 24th @ 6pm.

The Raise Your Voice March & Rally will be directly following the annual Seattle Dyke Rally at Seattle Central Community College. The March will go up to Volunteer Park will be lead by the Dykes on Bikes, and a short rally will commence in the Park.

Line up for the march starts at 4pm. The March will move north on Broadway, ending in Volunteer Park. The route concludes with the final act of terrific music festival at the park. Rounding out the evening is the Three Dollar Cinema, showing their annual movie in the park.

Ok, long story short I’m asking my friends to come and support not only a Seattle tradition, but the beginning of a NEW Seattle tradition. And hell, to help me out!! If you’re reliable, and looking to be an integral part of this effort, I can use all the volunteers I can get. Assignments would be simple, and FUN.
Please if any of you are interested, let me know!!

Tao Te Ching

The Tao Te Ching was written in China roughly 2,500 years ago at about the same time when Buddha expounded the Dharma in India and Pythagoras taught in Greece. The Tao Te Ching is probably the most influential Chinese book of all times. Its 81 chapters have been translated into English more times than any other Chinese document.
The Tao Te Ching provides the basis for the philosophical school of Taoism, which is an important pillar of Chinese thought. Taoism teaches that there is one undivided truth at the root of all things. It literally means:








tao (the way)
te (strength/virtue)
ching (scripture)

VERSE 1:

The Tao that can be spoken of is not the eternal Tao.
The name that can be named is not the eternal name.
The nameless is the beginning of heaven and earth.
The name is the mother of the ten thousand things.
Send your desires away and you will see the mystery.
Be filled with desire and you will see only the manifestation.
As these two come forth they differ in name.
Yet at their source they are the same.
This source is called a mystery.
Darkness within darkness, the gateway to all mystery.

Not so anonymous...

I finished reading "A Million Little Pieces" by James Frey about a week ago. It's actually alot closer to "Ten Little Pieces" as a Dateline Hollywood article spoofed. The book was an interesting read but throughout I had to keep pushing the "Man Who Conned Oprah" article published by The Smoking Gun out of my head, to be able to enjoy it.

After dating a "dry" alcoholic for 3+ years, I really took this book to heart. I can't recall the countless episodes I've experienced with J. Alcoholics don't stop being alcoholics, just because they don't drink doesn't mean they're fixed. The affliction lives with them forever, and with their partners, & families as well.

J and James have an unfortunate quality in common, they both HATE AA and what it stands for, and they think they can will themselves to not drink. However, I thought it a little contridictory when he started reading or studying the Tao Te Ching by Lao Tzu. For someone who blatently abhors organized religion, he sure took a liking to the book.
If you'd like a REAL memoir of a drunk, packed full of ups & downs and messy relapses - Check out "Dry" by Augusten Burroughs.

I don't really know where I'm going with this post, I guess I'm just in the mood to get some shit out. After I read the book, I looked into the Tao, and honestly I had a hard time putting it down. It makes alot of simple statements but they are views I wish more people lived by. Its full of positive self affirmations, and tells you to open up your mind to not complicate things. Just take things as they are. I think just this alone would alleviate a whole shit load of stress in my life.

Speaking of stress, anyone up for a vacation? Ya, I am. I need to get out of this god foresaken office, and spend sometime outdoors. Camping, hiking, sleeping, eating... feeling better. This may be something I seriously persue. Take off for a weekend and get the hell out of here.

Spoken Words...

My new favorite comedian....

http://www.ernestcline.com/spokenword/


I couldn't help myself. I had to post this link. The saddest part about this is it's all painfully true.

We're nothing but monkey's with thumbs.

http://www.inflash.com/swf/7709.swf

Blogging Hiatus

So, I don't think I've written anything, blogs included, for over a week and a half. Literally, I think everything I've communicated lately has been via email/computer. I haven't even been using my telephone much. Moving along...

After one week of being on a "diet", I'm ready to fall off the wagon. I've been living off of the following foods:

Breakfast: Chocolate Slim Fast, fruit or granola

Lunch: Chocolate Slim Fast, soup or half a sandwich

Snack: More granola

Dinner: Lean Cuisine

Dessert: A nice bowl of Special K

So, as you can see, I'm not eating much. I'm giving my body enough calories to keep my metabolism going, but on the flip side I'm STARVING and pissy. I am absolutely, without a doubt one of those people who get rather rabid if they don't eat frequently and substantially.

Back to this talk about falling off the fatty wagon, not only did I sneak some unnecessary hummus and chips from a neighboring potluck today but I went out drinking last night, and failed to remember Sarah's riveting tribute to Vodka Diets. Of course, I faltered and went for the vodka cran, not even realizing "Hey dumb ass liquids count just as much as food does!" I should know this, seeing as how all I've been eating is Slim Fast! UGH.

So the true test is just around the corner, THE WEEKEND. This is the first weekend of the diet. I'm thinking its a toss up whether or not it sticks.

Tune in and turn off - The Reality TV Generation

In honor of tomorrow's blessed reality television event (1st Episode of Season 6: America's Next Top Model) I thought I'd run down a few of my replacement programs. (In no particular order, and these are purely one's Im interested in:)

Celebrity Fit Club 3: There are so many obvious reasons to watch this show. Where else can you catch a glimpse of former scene stealing celebrities from years past, now in their current overweight and depressed state? Why, VH1 as a matter of fact! In case you've never had the pleasure of watching this show let me fill everyone in at home how this show works. Basically, VH1 picks some of the most shockingly fatty celebrities to compete on teams against each other for the most total amount of weight lost individually and as a team. Sounds a little entertaining, right? Just wait, it gets better... you have the ultimate opportunity to watch these poor disenfranchised souls announcing their successes and pitfalls in the Battle of the Bulge during a weekly weigh in. Between the tears, and laughter this season we had the chance to witness a drug induced outburst from none other than former Taxi star, Jeff Connelly. What more could you ask for? Sex maybe? Sure... I guess... but who wants to watch all that extra skin on Chastity Bono flapping around? This however leads me to my next bit of television eye candy...

Flavor of Love: Again, only on VH1 people... Who the hell else would give Flavor Flav's nonsense talkin' ass a show? Obviously, his stint on The Surreal Life AND Strange Love wasn't enough. At this point it looks like Flav's love life is really a personal mission for VH1. How sweet. This season, Flav had 20, 20-something ladies move into his California mansion and set up shop while he got to know each of them (with his penis), trying to determine which lady he had a shot at a "relationship" with. Ups and down, clocks or no clocks, screaming matches, completely delusional women, spitting in faces and a verbal bashing by Brigitte Nielson... somehow we have made it down to two women. Oh, excuse me... one woman, and one nut case. Maybe one of them will figure out "what time it is" and jump ship before she becomes the mother to the last 4 of Flav's desired 10 children. Either way... I must admit I will miss the chance at seeing his chrome plated mouth chow down on one more chicken wing...

The Gauntlet: I have to say, after not having cable for about 5 years I'm pleased to see MTV is still finding ways to spin and change The Real World and Road Rules... now spawning a hybrid of the two, The Gauntlet. Not only does MTV whisk them away to a tropical destination ( = no clothes), but they shack them up together ( = sex). Admittedly, the only reason I started watching this sweaty, hormonally charged show was because of one woman... BETH. This chick was a trash talking narcissist on Real World L.A. Season 2, and not a damn thing has changed. My god, that had to be close to 8 years ago, and the bitch is still running her mouth! Now that Beth has fatefully departed the show, after bitching out in The Gauntlet, I'm left to watch the remaining challengers scratch and fight their way toward some cash. And get naked along the way!

Opening Blog - Take 2

So, yesterday after admitting pure boredom for the 800th time while at work, I decided to follow in the wise footsteps of two friends, and set up a blog spot. I began typing, feeling the words gush out of my fingertips, thoughts guiding my hands across the keyboard. A riff between two friends, fresh in my mind, I had plenty to blog about. I was on a role, witty comments, smart one liners... it all sounded great. It was really shaping up to be a work of greatness... then the unthinkable happened. My shitty web browser CLOSED. No prompt, no warning... no obligatory ERROR message. Just. Nothing. A blank screen followed by only the sound of my jaw hitting the desk. I was utterly irate, biting my tongue because I'm obviously at work, and unable to scream the bloody obscenities I really want to. Instead, I shut down my computer, and trudge home, trying desperately to recite the lost words in my mind, hoping they might stay fresh enough for me to scribble down when I arrive home. So, I sat with a pen and paper in front of me for what seemed to be hours on end, completely unable to recount the words I had typed only hours before. In the end, I gave up the useless attempt and turned my attention to more important things... Reality TV.